Interior Designer/Mom
Photo by Christina Winter on Unsplash
I’ve talked about the many renovations I’ve worked on for my mother in law and for us. We are currently half way done with the second floor that has the kid’s bedrooms. I’ve sat with my kids individually and as a group, depending on who’s sharing a bedroom. We’ve discussed what they want in terms of colors and designs. My older kids have a clearer idea of what they like. My oldest actually designed his room on Minecraft. My daughter drew it on her iPad. We’ve looked at furniture together. They’ve chosen paint colors on their own and there is something so special about being the interior designer for my kids. Its different. Different than when I was doing it or my mother in law, different than when I was doing it for myself and my husband. It’s just a special way to connect that I am so grateful for. I was worried my daughter, who can be so indecisive would give me trouble, but we actually finished everything in one sitting. She knew exactly what she wanted, she’s been dreaming of this makeover for years since she’s outgrown her too pink little girl room ages ago.
My three youngest boys all sat down and chose the color of their walls, we talked about where they wanted their furniture and whether they wanted to keep the bunk bed or take it down in to separate beds. My youngest (who’s 4) is so excited to be sharing a bedroom with his older siblings. He shares a room with his sister at the moment and its basically her bedroom with only his crib and dresser (changing table). I know, I should have upgraded his furniture sooner, but things don’t always go as planned. Its ok. He’s fine. His crib is pretty big.
As I was saying, planning my kids’ bedrooms has been nice, I’m enjoying it. We still aren’t done. I’m trying to include them in the decisions. If I don’t agree with a design idea we discuss it and make it work so they like it. We have changed designs multiple times. My youngest have been the easiest with the basic design. We still haven’t talked about the little design details. We will wait until we have furnished it.
It had been nice sitting with them and hearing their ideas and seeing how much they’ve grown and they each have their individual taste and style. I hope I can interpret their ideas and make them a reality. Designing for my kids has been vey rewarding. They are very special clients.
I can’t wait to finish and share the results with all of you on Instagram and Pinterest.
Don’t Judge
On the last day of school, as I was walking in the kindergarten area, reminiscing about the past. How fast the years have passed by and how my kids have grown. I was greeted by one of the employees. Someone new-ish to the school, who I didn’t know well. We were talking and she was telling me what a good mother I was and how everyone always says I’m such a wonderful mother. Then she said something that has been bothering me. she said: I’ve always been surprised that you don’t have a college degree, how you haven’t completed your education even though you seem so knowledgeable and educated. I was shocked! Where did she get this idea? Why did she think this?
I quickly responded: I am an interior architect, I went to college. I chose not to work because back when my oldest was born, there weren’t many nurseries for infants and they weren’t up to my standard. I told her my kids come first. Now I’ve done many renovations for family and I am happy with that. She looked a little embarrassed and asked for my number so she could advertise for me. I politely declined and told her I already had enough work for now and my youngest still needed me. My kids will always be my first priority. I know there are plenty of working moms that are amazing moms. I know there are plenty of awesome moms that didn’t get a college degree , that doesn’t make them uneducated. That’s not my point. Every family has its own circumstances. Everyone is free to make their own decisions. When I was pregnant with my first, I discussed this with my husband and we both agreed that our children needed me at home. I am lucky that I never needed to work. I know staying at home full time with my kids is a luxury not everyone can afford.
I know nowadays nurseries have changed a lot and there are very good child care places for young infants and even newborns. I understand that some people need to work and some people want to work. I respect that. I’m not judging anyone. Everyone does what is best for them and their family.
That’s my point: don’t judge, don’t make assumptions. Why do compliments have to have a catch? You are a great mother, for someone uneducated! You look great, for your age! It’s not a compliment anymore when you put it that way.
Summer Bucket List
This is a list of fun activities I wrote a long time ago when my older kids were much younger and before my youngest was born. We haven’t don’t everything. Only 60 as far as I remember. We are going to give this list another try since my three youngest don’t remember anything, and my oldest barely do. They do want to make their own list which I am open for. We’ve been busy with Eid, post Eid and renovations. Since we are renovating half of the house and planning on moving them to that half to do the other half we are also busy packing up their stuff which is hard since we are still living here and they are using a lot of it.
Anyway, as soon as we write sa new list I will post it inshallah.
Honesty, they didn’t bounce. They didn’t pop as fast as regular bubbles do so they were a lot of fun.
Recipe:
1 cup water
1 tablespoon dish soap
1 teaspoon glycerine (I found some at the pharmacy)
Let it is for 24 hours. I kept it in a jar.
A glove or sock helps so the bubbles don’t pop, even without them they didn’t pop quickly and were a lot of fun!
Make s’mores in a solar oven (it is so hot here that it actually melted the chocolate. I remember even back then I had workers and renovations going so we did it late in the afternoon after the workers left and the sun wasn’t as hot. We definitely need to try this again at noon and I’ll post the results.
Walk on sand with stamped flip flops.
Put on a puppet show.
Bake cookies.
Bake cupcakes.
Have a picnic. (indoors if it’s too hot)
Watch old cartoons. (We watched classics like Tom & Jerry and Donald Duck)
Have a donut in a coffee shop.
Make a den with the couch coushions.
Plant seeds and watch them grow.
Build an amazing Lego creation. (I bought this Lego Kit to try with the kids.)
Play a game of cards. (We always play Go fish)
Play UNO.
Pretend to be airplanes.
Make a home cinema including tickets and popcorn.
Do some cloud watching.
Make some pancake art. (I used an empty plastic squeeze bottle.)
Make homemade pizza.
Do a science experiment. (We made flying tea bags.)
Make sun prints. (You will find more science experiments here too.)
Draw chalk art outside.
Play a board game.
Nature rubbings.
Photographic alphabet.
Make a smoothie.
Recipe: (my original recipe from back then.)
One pineapple, peeled and chopped
One tall glass of orange juice. (5 oranges)
250 grams of frozen strawberries.
Make a milkshake.
Make a time capsule.
Make a marble run.
Make our family tree
Play rock paper scissors. (who knew how fun that could be!)
Write and send a letter.
Make popsicles.
Do a random act of kindness.
Learn about a different country.
Play hopscotch.
Play Restaraunt.
Draw around yourself on a big piece of paper and decorate it. (I used these awesome rolls of paper from Ikea)
Jump rope.
Play limbo.
Make a dominos line.
Make sock puppets.
Use a basket and string to hoist stuffed animals upstairs.
Write a story. I found these cute half written cartoons that could help inspire the kids.
Play freeze tag.
Have a water balloon fight.
Make lemonade.
Bake an apple pie.
Dinner by candle light.
Play charades.
Dress up and take photos.
Learn something new.
Play tic tack toe.
Build a Lego tower.
Go out for ice cream.
Play jenga.
Toast marshmallows.
Chalk and sponge targets.
Play eye spy.
Play musical statutes.
Origami. (We made butterflies.)
Have a three legged race.
Water bucket relay race.
Play carrom.
Make paper pinwheels. (I used during in stead a pin, I tied it in triple knots on both sides and then trimmed the string and it worked fine.
Play with huge balloons.
Learn how to make bubble gum bubbles.
Go out for breakfast.
Take a photo a day.
Watch the sunrise. (I have never accomplished this with my kids, I never want to volunteeringly was them up on vacation!)
Have a bubble bath.
Make a balloon-cup-shooter.
Make ice cream floats. (My older kids love root beer floats, a childhood favorite for me. I love that!)
Go night swimming with glow sticks.
Complete a DIY Project.
Tie dye t shirts.
Ride a rollercoaster.
Go bowling.
Photobooth.
Visit pet store.
Write a book together.
Make homemade pasta.
Balloon animals. (Harder than you think!)
Hold a Mario Kart tournament.
Have a water gun fight.
Play Hangman. (I remember my kids enjoyed it more than I expected!)
Do a puzzle together.
Have a connect four tournament.
Make something from Pinterest. (We made a lego candy dispenser.) & Hot dog octopus which the first time was a fail and the second time was much better. I cut the hot dogs in half which helped the “tentacles” curl and look for octopus like.
Make slush. (My kids idea and they loved it of course.
Recipe: (my recipe and notes from back then.)
200 ml of juice
100 ml of water
Pour in a shallow container and freeze for one hour. Take out, mix ice crystals. Put back in freezer for another half hour and repeat. It says it should be ready to serve but it took longer in my freezer. Maybe because my freezer is so full so I couldn’t put it deep inside? But the important thing is to keep checking on it and mixing so you don’t get big pieces of ice.
Have dessert for breakfast, we had marshmallow sandwiches between slices of french toast. It was delicious and the kids loved it!
I found more than weren’t in my notebook, that I had posted on YOU-app. I will add them tomorrow.
Hajj
Saturday was the last day of Hajj, a very important part of Islam. It is the 5th pillar of Isalm. As Muslims, we are required to perform Hajj once in our lives, if we are capable (can afford it and are physically able) It is an amazing experience. I confess writing this made me very emotional and I cried a lot writing this. Every Muslim dreams of performing Hajj but I think once you’ve experienced it your heart is forever connected and every year when you see all the Muslims gathered for Hajj your heart longs to be with them. This year has been the hardest year, I long to be with them and every time I think about it, talk about it or write about I start crying. I’ve talked to my husband and we are planning to go next year, God willing. We plan on taking our two oldest and my mother and mother in law. I know when the time comes we might have more companions. This is something you want to do by yourself but when you have the right kind of companions, someone to help you focus and pray with you it is a beautiful connection.
I performed Hajj about ten years ago, I had three children at the time. My youngest had turned one about two months before, though I was reluctant to leave him, my mother encouraged me to go. I would only be gone for a week. Hajj is six days and can be 5 days. It takes place in different areas of Makkah and is such a beautiful spiritual journey. We took our kids to my parents’ house in Dhahran and came back to Riyadh because we (my husband and I) were going with my mother in law and two sisters in law plus two nieces and two nephews. They were all great company during Hajj. It was good to have so many people by my elderly mother in law’s side. Hajj takes place in the last month of the lunar calendar. Since the lunar calendar depends on the moon, the months aren’t always in the same season. For example, this year Hajj took place in June but when I went to Hajj, it was the month of October, I actually had my birthday while I was at Hajj and it was the best way to spend that day.
Hajj nowadays is very easy, transportation has become so much easier that you can focus on the spiritual part more. I won’t talk about the government’s massive effort to make hajj easy and comfortable for EVERYONE, because there is so much to say and it would require a post of its own. I will just say they have gone above and beyond to make it better and better every year and the thousands of volunteers who help each year, whom we are very grateful.
Hajj nowadays is organized by groups, you register with a group and they are responsible to provide the basic accommodations for hajj. In general, they are all almost the same with some minor differences. We slept on a small mattresses in tents, shared bathrooms with other people in our group. But it was all very clean ad comfortable yet simple. I think that’s key with hajj, it’s not necessary nor is there anything against making Hajj luxurious but to me and most Muslims its beside the point. We are not there to stay in five-star accommodations. We are there to purify our hearts, to find God. To achieve the ultimate goal in life, forgiveness of all our sins, for peace, for happiness. It sounds like an impossible goal but it isn’t.
As soon as we reached our tents in Mina, there was a sense of excitement and anticipation, tomorrow was the most important day for us at Hajj and is a very important for all Muslims, in Hajj, we don’t fast, we wake up early and later, leave Mina for Arafa, an area named after a mountain there. We don’t have to be on the mountain, just anywhere in the area. We spend the day praying, asking God for forgiveness and asking Him for anything and everything. This day is different than any other day because God descends to the Earth’s sky and waits to hear our prayers to answer them. Whether you are in Hajj or not, it includes you. People who aren’t Hajj fast this day, fasting this day is rewarded with forgiving all your sins for the year past and the year to come. Can you imagine?! A simple thing such as fasting from daybreak to sunset with such a big reward. After sunset, we all walk to another area called Muzdalifa, we have the choice to rest a little and then move on to Mina where our tents are or spend the night and leave in the early morning. We rested and moved on. It was such a peaceful night, there were rugs where we could sit or lay down under the stars, the weather was cool but not too cold. We rested and prayed and moved on. The next morning was Eid, our second holiday in Islam, we had all brought something nice to wear I remember what a happy day it was, its amazing how the people we shard our tent with and the group we shared the simple facilities we had were like old friends and family, I am still in contact with some Hajj friends, one of them has moved to the UK but we still keep in touch. An important part of Islam that is emphasized during Hajj is: we are all equal. We are all humans, we are all the same, we are all gathered for the same purpose, worshipping God, hoping to achieve the ultimate goal, complete forgiveness and eternal paradise in the afterlife. During Hajj we dress simply, the men wear white clothes that are not sewn. The women dress modestly in any color they choose. The simplicity in dress is a humble reminder that we are all the sme. No one is better than anyone. We are all equal. It helps the unity and love we have as a Muslim community grow stronger.
The last four days of Hajj are spent in Mina, I remember waking up in the middle of the night to pray, finding most of the group awake praying. At the sound of athan (the call to prayer) we would gather to pray morning prayers together. Then we would sit together and one of us would give us a short religious talk. Then after the sun had risen we would pray ‘al duha prayer” the prayer after sunrise and then we would head to our own tents to take a nap and gain strength for the day ahead fo prayer and worship. On the 5th or 6th day of Hajj (you have a choice) We head to Al Haram where al Kaaba is and prefer m the last part of Hajj; tawaf al wada’a, walking around the Kaaba. Al wada’a means farewell. Because you are leaving Mecca after this last part of Hajj.
I always get emotional leaving Mecca as most Muslims do. You always wonder if this will be last time you will be there. An unbearable thought.
I’ve already started planning our Hajj journey for next year God willing. I am going to do everything I can to make it happen.
I hope this gave you an idea of what Hajj is about. This isn’t a detailed explanation, it is just my experience. If you have any questions, I would be more than happy to answer them. I will add some information in my dictionary page and a link to a website with a detailed diagram of Hajj.
More Ramblings.
Photo by Shaouraav Shreshtha on Unsplash
I have been very busy the past three weeks with finals, renovations, making sure I have all the building materials so the workers are on track and we finish as soon as possible. I did something I promised I wouldn’t do and I put the gym on hold. I haven’t gone for two weeks! But with everything going on I didn’t have the energy so that’s what I chose to sacrifice. I didn’t have a choice, did I?
I’ve been juggling being a mom, planning lunches and dinners while running errands for the renovation, meeting with the contractor and checking on the workers. Helping my fourth grader studying for his finals, making sure my sixth grader studied well. (He studies by himself. Checking on my 10th and 8th graders and make sure they are doing well studying, don’t need anything. Did I mention my husband was a way for two days? These past three weeks have been stressful, hectic, crazy, all that and more! Not to mention I was also sick with a sinus infection, something viral that went up to my eyes and made my vision blurry which I didn’t have time for, how am I supposed to help my kids study when all the letters are blurry? So, I did something I shouldn’t, I called my sister in a law- the doctor-. I told her all my symptoms and told her I don’t have time to go see a doctor, I did however have time to go to the tile shop that was late delivering the tiles to my soon to be art room and the kid’s’ play room. My sister in law bless her gave me eye drops and antibiotics. I started getting a little better. Until I found (my son pointed out) a broken blood vessel in my eye. That was last straw for my husband who insisted I went see a doctor. I reluctantly went. The broken blood vessel was unrelated to the virus and was actually healing. “Stress” the doctor said was the cause. Stressed!? Me? Not at all. Just normal mom life. Right? New eye meds and I’m feeling much better. Finals are done. The school year came to an end. The tiles all arrived. We are nowhere near finishing with the renovation but we are getting there. Last Sunday when my sixth grader came to me to review, he looked at me and asked if we could start from the beginning, I almost lost it! it was already past 8pm. I had to go to my husband for a hug and to supply myself with Starbursts candy (I’m not a candy person but that’s where I was at that moment) chips and a vitamin drink because I had already had a root beer that day. (my weakness, so nostalgic, tastes like childhood memories) I decided to order dinner (God bless food delivery apps!) I managed to finish with my son and put them to bed without completely losing it. I guess the lack of sleep and exhaustion had caught up with me. I had been staying up with my two oldest as they studied and of course got up early with them before school and of course the melody of workers breaking tile and wall! My four-year-old wanted me sleeping near him because he said he would be lost without his siblings, I think he meant alone. So, I slept on the sofa in the mornings after the others went to school, not an ideal bed. Of course, it’s not really sleep, when you are replying to messages from the contractor overseeing the renovation with me, the tile guy, the bathroom guy, my kids and my husband. But what do moms really sleep anyway? I’m not sure.
Well, school has ended for the year. No more finals, no more homework, no more research papers no more projects and no more school lunches!
We have exactly 8 weeks of vacation. I have mentioned that I have no plans for the summer. except for competing the renovation. I know I need to sit down and discuss summer plans with my husband. I know he will want to put them in summer programs. I know he wants them to do something useful, we will see.
I did promise a summer bucket list. Honesty I’ve been so busy and exhausted I couldn’t get any writing done. So, I promise it is coming soon. I will also sit with my kids and make a new one and post that soon.
End of the School Year Ramblings.
We have one week of finals before the school year ends. Like most parents, I am burnt out and ready for summer vacation. My boys started finals before my daughter and technically I will have had three weeks of finals when we are finished. My oldest in the 10th grade has two weeks and a half of finals with only one day break in the middle. I know he is also exhausted.
I have no plans for the summer at the moment. I think completing the renovation is more than enough.
I am done with super early mornings. (School starts at 6:30 am here because we need the school day to end before it’s too hot and to help minimize traffic (an impossible task in the capital) My kids go to two different schools so they have to leave earlier to make it in time before their first class starts.
I am done with school projects, school activities. No more creative lunch ideas. Though I confess I haven’t been very creative this past year. I’m done with school pickups and the occasional drop offs when my youngest is feeling a little grumpy.
I am done with school activities, homework, research and exams. My kids are older and more dependent on themselves, I just check on their progress and occasionally help with something or another. Usually providing materials for projects.
I know I will soon miss the structure school gives the day. I will try to keep bedtimes early (though that gets harder as they grow older) I know I will miss my quiet mornings and the chance to nap, to go on errands without feeling guilty for leaving the kids at home or taking them with me and boring them with my mom errands.
I will try to make sure we do fun activities together, have time to read, write and do something educational. I have a summer bucket list that I used to do with my kids when they were younger. That was before my youngest was born. I’m not sure my two middle boys remember much either. I’ve discussed making a new bucket list. My kids have been a little enthusiastic but of course they want to choose the activities themselves. We will need to sit and work on that after finals. I still have my old list which I will post later and link the activities I found on line.
My 6th grader told me they were having a class breakfast on Thursday. My response; why? I have zero energy left for any activities.
My daughter and her friends all have to change schools next year because the school doesn’t have a 9th grade. Apparently, they don’t have a license for middle school. My daughter has been going to the same school since she was 3! All my kids have studied in this school. It’s been an emotional week with my 4-year-old finishing school and going to his class room for the last time. The same classroom that 3 other children studied in. The school has been open for 12 years. We have been a part of it for 11! When we walked into the class room for the last time we got a little emotional. I’ve been a part of this school for so long. We will miss it and everyone there.
Changing schools is hard for the kids and the parents. Even my 4-year-old told me he didn’t want to change schools. My daughter and her best friends have been trying to convince their parents to put them in the same school. Easier said than done. Each parent has their own standards for what school their child goes too. The school we picked is farther than her current school but is a branch of the school. She will have a different principal and teachers, she knows only three students so far, but it’s a similar environment, I know the elementary school principal and she speaks high praise of the middle school and Highschool principal. Her twin daughters moved with her at the beginning of the school year (they are my daughter’s age) It seems like a good educational environment. We’ve researched, asked around, prayed and made our decision. Praying it is for the best.
This makes the end of this school year hard; my daughter doesn’t want her time with her friends to end at school but she is also tired of school and exams and needs a break. She will still speak to her friends and meet up with them, but it won’t be the same seeing them every day. Especially since they’ve been together since kindergarten and the first grade!
I helped her make gift boxes for her three best friends and they are having a gift exchange on Sunday. I know it’s going to be hard. Friends are everything at her age. I hope they keep in touch despite changing schools. I know how important having a good friend is.
As the school year comes to an end and I reflect on how much my kids have grown. Hopefully learned and accomplished. I know we all deserve a break. They have worked hard and done well and I am proud them. I have done my best to be helpful and supportive while I juggled my many responsibilities and health issues.
I think as the school year ends, it was a good year. Not amazing but good. I now have two middle schoolers, my youngest will be in kindergarten next year, a year away from elementary school. My oldest has two more years until he graduates high school ad moves on to college inshallah. How time flies!
I know too soon, they will have grown and moved on to college and jobs and have their own families and I won’t have this end of school year burn out. I know I will miss them. I try to cherish every phase of life as a mother. I know its ok to feel burnt out now, to be glad school is coming to an end and to enjoy the lazy days of summer. (well, as lazy as possible with 5 kids and a renovation project to oversee.)
I will try to give them as much time as I can, do fun activities, have friends over, and make the most of our hot Riyadh summers.
I know by the end of the summer, I might actually look forward to the new school year. That’s ok too.
The Gym
Photo of “Interval Plus”
I’ve written about losing myself, about drifting apart from friends while they pursued careers and higher education and I chased toddlers.
I think the first step of trying to find myself was going to the gym again. There I was Nuha. It’s crazy but until I started going to the gym, I wasn’t called Nuha much. When you are a stay at home mom, you don’t get out much and here we have the culture of calling you by your oldest son’s name, or if you have a kid in the same class your named by that kid. So, I was usually called mama or someone’s mom (in Arabic: Umm “child’s name” So I was: Umm Abdullah) . Sure, my husband called me by first name but I guess not that often, my mother in law did call me by my name but always introduced me as Khaled’s wife. Which is fine, there is nothing wrong with that but I needed to be reminded that I was my own person. I wasn’t just a mom, wife, daughter in law. I was me, I was Nuha.
So, after my fourth was born, I don’t remember how old he was when I started going to the gym for the first time. I would leave the kids with my husband and go to the gym. I started at “Curves”. It was perfect for me, one hour at the gym and you’re done. It wasn’t too intense which was good because I wasn’t as fit as I used to be. I have always exercised since I was a kid. I’d walk to the recreation center and swim and come back walking. I used to enjoy it so much. I used to lose the baby weight easily after each child by exercising at home. I even had a folder of exercise I had photo copied at the library when I was in college. Mostly core exercises. I think having a strong core helped me lose the baby belly after giving birth. After my third I discovered Leslie Sanson. She was a lot of help. I’d open Youtube, I even boght a couple of her dvd’s. My kids would walk with me and I remember my third being maybe one and holding my hand and kicking, as if he was telling me; come on mama lets exercise. My fourth was the hardest to lose the extra weight and going to the gym really helped. I continued to go to “Curves” on and off until I became pregnant with my fifth. Two miscarriages scared me from going to the gym and I was put on modified bed rest with this pregnancy.
When he was less than two years old I signed up to an awesome gym” Interval Plus”. It focused on CrossFit and interval training. They had less intense (still very intense) classes too. I used to go, die and go home dead but happy. Hahaha! It was such a great feeling being able to finish the classes there! I started going there a little before the pandemic began and everything closed. I’m grateful I was with them during the pandemic because even after they reopened they were very careful and it always felt like a safe environment. That time was difficult for me since I had four kids in school doing distance learning in two shifts morning and evening so I was already drained and never seemed to get enough sleep. I ended up leaving this gym because it was too much for me at the time. I still dream of a time when I am fit enough to go back.
I enrolled in another gym; “Fitness Time” next. I honestly went there only to swim and come back, it was the perfect thing for me at that time. We were still doing distance learning and R got his diagnosed during that time. Somedays, I would go to the gym and sit in the pool and cry. Sometimes that was my only chance to cry. I used to go in the early morings when the pool was empty and I had it to myself. Swimming first thing in the morning, with a huge pool all to myself, was pure bliss.
The one thing all these gyms had in common was the distance, they weren’t too far but sometimes with traffic I would take me at least 20-25 minutest get there. Thats an issue when you’re ruining late and want to join a class. It also had to be counted as part of my gym time so sometimes I only had half an hour at the gym and the rest in the car.
Then something amazing happened! A gym opened within walking distance form my house. “Body Motions” It was literally 5 minutes by car. That made it so much easier for me to go. When the weather is cooler, I go waking sometimes. It helps me go every day, no excuses.
My experience at this gym was so different than any other gym. I almost immediately signed up with a personal trainer and it made such a difference. She held me accountable so I couldn’t skip my classes. She listened to me and slowly increased intensity. She pushed me to work harder. She was very patient with me when I went through the dizzy phase. She could tell when I was about to become dizzy, would tell met to sit down, get me fresh orange juice from the vending machine She is the best! Even now she knows when I need to pause, when I need to go wash my face and cool down. She never let me give up and still pushes me to work harder and gain strength. It has been a great experience for me and even a year later, I am still working out with her. This is one luxury I will not give up. I’d rather give up coffee which if you know me says a lot!
I’m not really a social person at the gym, I’ve written about how that is my time to myself. But the past couple of months, I’ve made two friends at the gym, they work out with my personal trainer too and it’s been nice having someone to motivate you to go to the gym. We check in on each other and cheer each other on. They are really nice and I never thought I’d make gym friends but I’m glad I did.
I may have started to go to the gym to lose the baby weight, but now it is way more than just that. Its a place where I let go of any negativity I’m feeling. Its a place where I’m me, and only me. Its a place where I’m surrounded by strong motivated woman which is so motivating to become stronger.
I may have started working out to lose the baby weight but now I’m more focused on how much strength I’ve gained. I’m already thinking about the Riyadh marathon for 2024 and wondering if I should try doing the half marathon. I know fitness does not have an age and I hope to continue work out and maintain my strength so I’m that cool grandmother that can do a handstand. Hahaha.
Jokes aside, I will continue my fitness journey because I love myself and I try my best to keep myself healthy so I can fulfil my many responsibilities, be a good mom and partner, pursue my dreams and be happy.
Bad Days
Photo by Ketut Subiyanto:
I wrote this back in April when I was going though an especially stressful time. I was hesitant to post, because it’s hard to admit that you felt overwhelmed by day to day life sometimes. I know it’s ok to feel this way. I am only human. I have been feeling so much better. A recent long weekend getaway gave me the boost I needed. I am posting this to remind everyone that its ok to feel this way. We need to take care of ourselves and ask for help sometimes. Give ourselves a break.
Sometimes being a mom is hard because you can’t t have a bad day. You can’t call in sick and stay in bed all day. The thing is, you will have bad days. Despite that, you will still have to do everything as a mom. You will still have little people depending on you to provide breakfast, lunch, dinner and clean underwear. You will still need to do bedtimes and school pickups. You will need to bottle up your feelings because you need to be the same loving mom as usual because your kids don’t need to know your having a bad day. Sometimes its ok to share your feelings with your children but sometimes, if it’s an adult issue, I don’t think you should burden them. They are only kids, they will become adults soon enough. Let them enjoy their childhood.
If you’re lucky you will get a chance to go to the gym and take it out on the machines or do whatever it is that makes you feel better and take out the stress. If you’re really lucky you’ll have someone to listen to you complain about how taken for granted you feel for being a SAHM with no job instead of realizing you have multiple jobs.
Having these thoughts in the middle of the night when you’re supposed to be sleeping but you’re not because you got up to go to the bathroom. Then you had all these intrusive thoughts when all you want to do is sleep and you wish it was the weekend already or even better summer vacation! I think it says a lot when your wishing for summer vacation even though that means a house full of kids everyday all day for two months…
Then, it will hit you; that that’s the reason you’ve been feeling so overwhelmed by life lately. You are burnt out, it’s not one single thing, its an accumulation of so many things. You need a break, but that’s not always possible. As a mom, taking a break is something that requires so much planning and coordinating. You need to discover little things that help relieve the pressure when you’re feeling overwhelmed. You need to learn to delegate, ask for help when life seems like it’s too much. You don’t always have to do everything yourself.
As I write this I’m reminded of my word for 2023: Balance. I know I haven’t reached the Balance I aim for. I’m working on it. I’m learning. I still forget that I can delegate. I still forget that my kids are growing older and can help too sometimes. I still want to do everything myself, because I want things done my way. But, I’m learning. When I’m having a bad day, I try to do the things that I enjoy. Going to the gym is my first choice. Sometimes I go out for a cup of coffee by myself, something I never used to do. Sometimes indulging in a decadent dessert helps. Sometimes, a hug from one of my kids reminds me why I became a SAHM. It reminds me how blessed I am to have them. Its ok to have bad days. We just have to remember they aren’t all bad.
Renovations
Photo by Nolan Issac on Unsplash
Before we started any major renovations, I think the first project we did was fixing up a room for our kids after sharing a room with them for way too long. We had a boy and a girl at the time and we made it fun and colorful. I even stenciled flowers on the book shelf to match the carpeting.
I decided to paint a wall in the play room when my husband took my mother in law to Al Madinah. I was actually pregnant with my third and chose a water-based paint that didn’t have any dangerous fumes or smells. That wall was previously painted with a matt paint that would wipe away when I tried cleaning my young children’s art off the wall. I had had enough with their murals and decided to paint over it.
When my third was born as a gift for my two older children I stenciled flowers above my daughter’s bed and dinosaurs above my son’s bed.
After giving birth to our fourth child we turned a former storage room into a bedroom for the boys and redid the first bedroom for my daughter. She was five at the time and insisted all the walls be painted pink. She’s almost 14 now and hates pink! We also moved the living room to the previously play room and I finally made some matching art and felt that the house had my touch.( My husband had completely furnished our apartment before we even met.)
We started our first major renovation in 2017. Our first project was our master bathroom and my MIL’s master bathroom. The renovation was long overdue. We live with my MIL in my husband’s childhood home, he was born in what is now the dining room, so you can imagine how old the house is. (No, I’m not calling my husband old, house years are different than human years!)
At the time, we had four kids, our youngest was two and a half. A pattern we have noticed with renovations is, my husband usually has a work trip in the middle of it. With this renovation, he had multiple work trips and was barely home. It was summer vacation; my MIL was in her summer home in Jordan. So, I was alone at home with 4 young children and a major renovation project on my hands. Two of my younger brothers who were still students at the time, took turns staying with me to help out. That was a huge blessing!
The thing about renovating old houses is you are most likely to find some surprises! Not nice surprises, no, no! What-are-we-going-to-do-about-that, How-can-we-fix it? kind of surprises!
When we renovated the bathrooms, we found a concrete slab under the original concrete slab that had collapsed and was held up with the aluminum false ceiling. A very cool design feature back in the day. Can you imagine what would have happened if we had delayed the renovation? Who knows how long the aluminum ceiling would have held the concrete before it collapsed! We were lucky!
After this renovation, we started working on my mother in law’s house. (She lived on the ground floor, we lived on the first floor.) Every summer when she went away, we would choose a couple of rooms. We started with her bedroom, one thing led to another and we ended up doing the dining room, maid’s bedroom and living room. We also decided to change all the interior doors. That project, started simple, ended up being very complicated and stressful. We finished the day she was arriving and the cleanup job would have never finished without the help of two of my sisters in law and two maids we hired by the hour. The end result made it all worth it. My mother in laws delight with results helped us forget all the stress.
In the middle of the year when my husband was away for a week and my oldest had his foot in a cast with a fractured foot, I decided to change the carpeting and paint my dressing room and the stairs. Because, why not?
The summer after that we decided to do the formal living room, keep in mind I was about 7 months pregnant with my youngest and did most of the material shopping in the mornings under the scorching sun. It may have been hotter, but the evenings the traffic is horrible and the shops more crowded. In the mornings I had the streets and the shops to myself. Of course, we had to add more details to the renovation, changing the curtains for the living room and my mother in law’s bedroom a long with the formal living room. It may sound like simple tasks but choosing fabrics to match existing furniture is harder than you think. Especially when your choosing according to someone else’s taste. My mother in law prefers more classic designs, while I prefer more modern. We also decided to fix up the laundry room and maid’s bathroom, the kitchen ceiling and lighting. Not big details but they did require emptying the laundry room, buying tiles and lighting… Remember I was pregnant with my youngest and had 4 other kids. My kids were older this time and more help. I also hired a full time maid that summer. The biggest blessing!
The pandemic forced us to put our renovations on hold. Until a leak in water pipes in the street in front of our house caused the land to sink, and our main entrance and front wall shifting and cracking. We have to demolish the wall and buy a new door before they collapsed on their own. (It really needed an upgrade anyway) One thing led to another and what started as a new front wall (fence) and main entrance turned into a complete makeover of the front and back yard, and the addition of a third floor! The fact that we started the project backwards, digging up our front yard and then deciding to add a floor, made this project extra stressful. Some surprises along the way. (old house surprises are not fun) lots of setbacks, lots of mistakes, some were my fault. I may be an interior architect but I don’t have much experience. Some mistakes were misunderstandings. Some were just unimaginable. In the end everything turned out great and I am proud of the end result. The third floor is really a reflection of my taste and I love it.
It’s been over a year since we have finished that phase of the renovation and we are ready to start a new phase (and hopefully the last phase) of renovating our house. We are starting with my mother in law’s kitchen, which she has had for over thirty years± she is finally ready to let it go. We also have the second floor, with my kids’ bedrooms and my kitchen to renovate. Hopefully we will manage to finish everything quickly without any surprises.
I will take you along on our renovation as much as I can. Follow me on Instagram and Pinterest to see the progress.
If you haven’t guessed already, we started this renovation with my husband away on a business trip, haha.
Growing Up in UPM
I talked about growing up in the US and moving back to Saudi Arabia. Today I would like to talk about growing up in the KFUPM faculty housing, or what we used to call UPM or al jama’a (the university). KFUPM stands for King Fahed University of Petroleum & Minerals.
As we slowly became a part of the community and made friends, we discovered the joys of living in UPM. I had a uncle who lived in UPM too. It was nice to have family near by. He was always one of my favorite uncles and one of the few uncles that we knew in the US. I remember when he first got married and brought his bride to visit us while we were still in the US, I resented her at first because i thought she was taking away our cool, fun uncle. How i was wrong, now i am so close to her!
We had two playgrounds within walking distance where we would play with the neighborhood kids. UPM in general and our neighborhood especially was filled with magnificent tall trees. Something that has always been important to me. I couldn’t imagine my life without them. I also remember our last road trip in the US when we stopped by the mountains in Pennsylvania and my mother told us to remember the lush green of the trees because we weren’t going to see much of that in Saudi Arabia. I didn’t understand until our first road trip to Taif. It was an adventure for us. I was in love with the beauty of the desert.
UPM is like a small town, we had everything we needed and could go months without leaving. We had a clinic, a school from nursery to high school, supermarket, which we called the co-op. a Shawarma restaurant and the Recreation Center. The recreation center was great. We had a library with a large collection of books and magazines. A cafeteria which had a distinct greasy smell that wasn’t bad but wasn’t good. They did have great french fries. A basketball court, two swimming pools for men and women. They even added a small gym next to the women’s swimming area. There was even a dressmaker who would sew our school unfirms. I remember walking there on crisp cool mornings at the end of the summer with my sister to have our measurements’ taken before school started.
We really were like a small town in the sense that everyone knew everyone. All the kids played together. I could walk to the Rec Center or the co-op by myself without my parents worrying. Everyone looked out for everyone’s kids. I have so many great memories. There was a bazar held at the Rec Center in the fall usually in October my birthday month which made it more special to me. I would save up my allowance waiting for the bazar to see what treasures I could find; jewelry, a one of kind painting by a local artist. Always an apple fritter from a local donut shop and fresh flowers for my mom.
I have a lot of great memories at the Rec center. Having the freedom to go walking by myself was a huge blessing. I used to go with my sister to the library, meet up with friends at the swimming pool. I spent almost every day at the pool during summer breaks. I would walk to the pool in the early afternoon when the sun was hottest but the water was coldest. I’d almost always have the pool to myself because most people preferred to wait for the sun to go down and the weather to be cooler. My friends would come later in the day and we honestly would mostly stand in the pool and chat or play games, so I enjoyed my solo swims. I remember when my youngest brother was almost three my sister and I used to take him to the swimming pool. He was fearless and would run ahead and jump into the deep side, much to our despair. So, we always put his floats on his arms in the locker room just in case. He eventually took swimming lessons and learned how to swim so we didn’t need to worry so much. I never took formal swimming lessons but my aunt taught me the basics and I would try different strokes until I became a good swimmer. Swimming is my favorite type of exercise. There is something so relaxing about swimming. Especially when the sun is bright and the water is ice cold.
The library was one of my favorite places. During finals, sometimes I would go study at the library with my sister, we almost always found a friend studying their too. It was easier to focus in the silence of the library.
The librarians all knew us well. As I mentioned before we are a family of avid readers and we probably read most of the books in the children’s/young adults’ section. The library was also a place to photocopy papers for school, or photo copy interesting articles from magazines.
The biggest pleasure was discovering a new series to read. I read all the Laura Ingalls Wilder books multiple times, Enid Blyton Books, The Box Car Children, Beezus and Ramona, Babysitter Club, Sweet Valley High, Goose Bumps, Fear Street, Nancy Drew, Anamorphs... Anything I could get my hands on.
My school was within walking distance from home and I preferred walking to school instead of going by bus. I would wake up early, get dressed and read the newspaper. I always skipped breakfast. I would leave the house and early and usually be the first or second girl in my class. Most of my classmates were the same from the 5th grade until we graduated. I’m still in touch with a few. Four of them went to college with me. When we were in high school, my class liked rearranging the desks in our class room. While the rest of the girls drew different ideas on the blackboard, I would sit quietly with a paper and a pencil and draw an idea. A it if the time they chose my idea. One day our English teacher complimented us on our new arrangement and asked who designed it? She told me I would make a great Interior Designer, it’s funny how I didn’t take her words seriously. I met her a few years after I graduated from high school. I reminded her of the story and told her I was studying Interior Architecture. Its funny how things happen, isn’t it?
We had an annual gathering at the beginning of the summer when the girls who studied abroad came back home. Since I was the one who didn’t study abroad, I would usually host it. One time I cooked for them an Italian dinner, my brother who helped me get all the ingredients, asked me to cook the same dinner for his friends and I did.
When I was in college, one of the young mothers in UPM started a weekly gathering for high school and college girls. We would gather in a different house every week and she would talk to us about religious topics. She always made it so interesting and simple. Afterwards we would have coffee and simple desserts brought by the girls attending. It was always nice to have day to connect with friends who were going to different colleges and I didn’t see regularly anymore. On rare occasions the host would make dinner. It was always a casual easy going gathering. Lots of chatting and laughter.
Slowly, the group of girls that were close to my age, started graduating from college, finding jobs, getting engaged, married, becoming mothers. We slowly started to drift apart. I got married as I’ve mentioned a year before graduation. I spent a year at my parents, spending weekends with my husband whenever possible. I moved to Riyadh and lost touch with a lot of people. Now, when we go visit my parents, UPM is so different! I barely know anyone. It doesn’t have that one family feel that we had. I am so grateful that I grew up in UPM when it was at its best (in my opinion) I do see groups of mothers meeting at the park while their children play together. It does bring back memories. I know I grew up in a time when UPM was smaller, life was simpler and kids played outside more. I’m grateful I grew up in a time when video games weren’t as popular and no one had a mobile phone accept for a few adults. Where people still depended on land lines, mail, and paper newspapers.
I know the advance in technology has its benefits but I’m glad I grew up during a simpler time. I try my best to give my kids the time to play like kids used to with toys and dirt and slides. I hope they look back to their childhood’s as fondly as I do.
Moving Back to Saudi Arabia
Photo of Al Hada mountains in Al Taif
I talked about growing up in the US. Today I would like to talk about moving back to Saudi Arabia. When we moved back, I had a vague idea of what it was like from memories when I was probably too young to remember, photos, and my parents’ descriptions.
The flight to Saudi Arabia was a small adventure for me as a kid. We took multiple flights to reach Jeddah.
When we arrived at the airport in Jeddah, we were greeted by our aunts and uncles and some friends who used to live in the US too. I only knew three uncles who had visited us in the US. We got in multiple cars, I got in the car with our family friends with one of my brothers I remember they offered us boxes of milk and I was shocked; is this what milk tastes in Saudi Arabia? I loved milk! It’s funny how milk can taste different from country to country. We did find a brand of fresh milk that tasted similar to the milk we knew. We gathered at one my uncles house where so many uncles and aunts and cousins were waiting. I’m sure many tears were shed but I don’t remember that part. I just remember the excitement in the air and the joy. My dad’s family had a wedding to attend, my mom’s side of the family took us up to Taif to see my grandmother. I’m sure that was a tear filled joyous reunion. We probably had slept a lot on the airplane so we weren’t sleepy we stayed up all night with two of my cousins. We finished an entire box of cucumbers! Cucumbers in Saudi Arabia are small with small barely visible seeds. Delicious!
I don’t know how long we stayed in Taif getting acquainted with family before we got on one more plane and went to the Eastern Province; Dhahran. Our final destination, our new home. The university (Where my dad was a faculty member) has furnished housing for faculty. Our house had a big yard fenced with tall green bushes. We had a magnificent tree in the middle. I shared a room with my sister that over looked our front yard and that tree.
The first year was a jumble of emotions. It was hard adjusting to a new to us culture. Yes, we did have a big connection with the Muslim community in the US but life was different in Saudi Arabia. Not better or worse just different. I made new friends, but I missed my friends in the US. I kept in touch with some via mail. Something I wish the newer generations would appreciate.
My siblings and I weren’t fluent in Arabic, my school almost didn’t accept me because my Arabic was so bad. I even spelled my dad’s name wrong! To help us we had a lot of extra Arabic classes. Back then it was a burden to me. I missed out on all the fun classes; art, home economics, PE, computer, even English class! We had extra classes on the weekend in Arabic and Science. I remember my science teacher drawing a diagram of the heart on my hand while explaining it to me. I can imagine how hard it was, learning the Circulatory System let alone in a new language. I am grateful now for all the people who put in so much work to help us succeed. What a difference a year made for us! We also had the help and support of my mom and my aunt, who moved in with us for a year to help my mom tutor 5 kids! We were a handful and my aunt was a lot of help. When I look back and realize that I studied by myself the next year and only needed help studying history, I realize what an amazing job my parents, aunt and teachers did! I will always be in debt to them!
After one year we moved to a bigger house to fit our large family. We welcomed one more sibling a couple of months after we moved back to Saudi arabia which made us a family of 8 mashallah! In case you’re wondering, yes, my mom is a superhuman mashallah. But, that is a post of its own.
When we moved to our new house, I made a new friend. How did we meet? At the bus stop in the morning waiting for our school buses. She was reading a book, that’s what started the conversation. This friend whom I’ve been friends with since the sixth grade. We have lost touch and reconnected but I will always consider her a friend. We have a very special friendship and our parents called us sisters.
I think one of the most significant differences for me after we moved was the month of Ramadan. Yes, we did have a special connection to the Muslim community in the US. We were all one big family. We went to the mosque and had breakfast together and prayed together. But in Saudi Arabia it was different because the entire country celebrated this month. Almost everyone is fasting. (I actually had a college professor from the UK who was Christian and fasted out of respect, she was a wonderful person for so many reasons.) The atmosphere changes during the month of Ramadan. I can’t really explain it, but everything seems better. There is a warmth and peacefulness about this month. You can hear the canons (an old tradition that would tell people it was time to breakfast before we had microphones. This tradition ha stopped years ago but was still happening when we first moved) You can hear the prayers of taraweeh from multiple mosques in the area. Certain foods would appear at the supermarkets and restaurants such as sambuusa and kunafa (Find my recipe here.) Neighbors would share plates of yummy savory dishes and desserts. School hours and work hours would shift slightly to allow people to get some sleep after night prayers and suhoor. At school we had a Ramadan Evening, where we would perform for our mom’s songs, prayers, poetry.
Of course, the preparations for Eid were always exciting. Especially since we would go to Taif and spend it with my grandparents (may God have mercy on their souls) and aunts, uncles and cousins! Ramadan at my grandparents’ house was always extra special with so many relatives to share it with. My mom sometimes would do her Eid baking at my grandfather’s house and the smell of all the yummy sweets would fill the house while all the helping hands worked with my mother. Eid night was always exciting preparing for Eid morning. Waking up early and having breakfast with so many people. Getting all dressed up and receiving gifts and money from the adults. Eating and playing games with all the cousins. My siblings and cousins actually started a tradition of throwing a Eid party and playing games. My sister is the one who started the tradition of a piñata. One Eid my brother and I planned a scavenger hunt. We had so much fun together. Now you know how my own traditions started. After lunch we usually went to visit my mom’s side of the family at my grandmother’s house. How I would love to go back in time and spend one more Eid with her.
Summers were so much more fun now that we were back because beside living in KFUPM faculty housing which was a such a blessing. (I will talk about that next week inshallah) We also spent summer break with relatives. Either we went to Taif where the majority lived, and others joined us there, or, they came to visit us in Dharan. I have so many fond memories of spending summers in Taif. Between my paternal grandfather’s house and my maternal grandmother’s. We would spend it with so many cousins. I have one cousin on my dad’s side who was closest to my sister and I’s age. We were inseparable. Sometimes we would spend the night at her house where they lived in a compound for a Military hospital where my uncle worked. It is such a beautiful place to live and we enjoyed the cool weather of Al Hada (Al-Hada Mountain is one of Al-Sarawat Mountains in the city of Taif West of Saudi Arabia.) Since it has a natural mountain terrain the compound was built on different levels with lots of stairs to go up and down. They had a recreation center where we could go swimming, play bowling, and even get a haircut. We could even go to the supermarket and buy snacks and rent a movie to watch together.
I am so grateful for all the wonderful childhood memories I have growing up; between living in KFUPM and spending my summers in Taif.
I will talk about growing up in KFUPM next week inshallah.
Growing Up in the US
Photo by Matthew Rumph on Unsplash
I am from Saudi Arabia, from Al Madinah. I was born in Lafayette, Indiana. We moved to Champaign Illinois when I was very young. I went to school there until the fourth grade.
We lived in two different houses in two neighborhoods that were near each other. The first neighborhood was called Fox Ridge. We had a big (in my little eyes) house with a basement. Our neighbors across the street had a girl my age, we were best friends. The street was full of kids of different ages and we played together outside every day. Life was so simple and so much fun back then. I remember my mom telling a story of when she invited me to a tea party once. A week later I invited her to a tea party without telling my mom! Was my surprised when her mom asked my mom what time she should drop her off!
We moved to Parkland Ridge before I started school. Our house was a duplex and our neighbors had a daughter one year younger than me. We quickly became best friends and played together every day. We made up so many games. We both preferred playing outside to watching tv. Sometimes my brothers and the kid down the street, would join us. My sister wasn’t much of an outdoors type. But, we played lots of games inside. We had such a big imagination and made up a lot of our own games. It’s a lot of fun when you have 4 siblings to play with!
We lived in a great neighborhood and it was perfectly safe for me to walk to my friend’s house up the street to play. My older brother would have to walk with me because it was around the corner and across the street and too far for my mom to see from our house. (I was only 9 at the time) Our bus stop was at the end of the street and it was a little downhill, so we could pretend to ice skate down on cold winter mornings. There is a small lake within walking distance that I remember walking to every morning with my grandfather and step grandmother (may God have mercy on their souls) when they came to visit the last summer before we came back.
My parents new most of our neighbors, I of course new the neighbored that had kids! We did have a sweet elderly couple who lived one house down from ours, they were so nice. Mrs. V would let us watch her work in her garden and tell us about the different vegetables she grew. When we had a 50’s and 60’s themed spring concert, she taught us what to wearing how to style our hair. Before we moved back to Saudi Arabia, Mr. V made us leather bookmarks with our initials burned into them. They were beautiful! I still have mine.
At school, I never was treated differently. I never felt different. Except during holidays, but our school respected that we didn’t celebrate their holidays. We never had to participate in the Christmas concert, or exchange gifts for Christmas. We did usually get a gift from Santa. Which I think was really kind of them. We were only kids after all. We enjoyed watching people dress up for Halloween, my mom would buy candy so we could give trick’o’treaters and see all their fun costumes. One Halloween, a family friend took us to a Haunted House. I remember it wasn’t too scary but a lot of fun. I admit that Halloween was my favorite holiday to watch but not celebrate. I like the slightly spooky atmosphere. There was something about the crisp cold of autumn in Illinois that somehow made everything better. Maybe it’s because I was born at the end of October. Autumn is my favorite season. I really miss that here in Saudi Arabia. Our Autumns and Springs are pretty short and completely different! My parents used to take us to this apple orchard where you can pick your own apples, get lost in the corn maze, pet sweet rabbits at the petting zoo, buy some old fashion candy and enjoy a freshly made apple donut and a cup of apple cider. I remember picking raspberries, my favorite fruit, there too. The bees were always a little intimidating but that never stopped me from picking those plump juicy berries.
We lived near a beautiful lake called Lake of the Woods. It was a beautiful lake surrounded by trees where we used to meet friends and have a lot of fun. I remember riding on the peddle boats when my uncles came to visit.
We went on so many school field trips to historical places. I really enjoyed them. It is so interesting learning about the history of a place. I don’t remember the names of the places but I remember visiting old houses, preserved with the original furniture. We even went to a historical village. I think all these experiences enriched my childhood.
I have nice memories of growing up in the US, of the friends I made (I’ve recently reconnected with one friend), the places we visited, the things I learned. My love for reading, which I’ve talked about before, started in the US with a great reading program at school and encouragement from my parents who are avid readers too. I think being bilingual has really helped me learn so much throughout my life.
Leaving the US was hard, I remember how my next door neighbor didn’t go to the airport with us because she knew she would cry. Most of our friends came to the airport to see us off. It was really nice of them and something I will always remember. It was bittersweet for us, we were leaving the only home we knew, yet we were excited to go back home to our family.
I will talk about coming back to Saudi Arabia and growing up here next week inshallah.
Insomnia
Photo by SHVETS production
I know I’m definitely not the only one who suffers from insomnia. I used to have so many sleepless nights. My sleep has actually gotten so much better and my sleepless nights are few and far between. But, there are some nights where, as soon as my head hits the pillow the sleep disappears. All of a sudden, I’m wide awake. This usually happens on the days where I was exhausted all day, where I wanted to doze off in the middle of many tasks and may have actually dozed off throughout the day. I probably had too many cups of coffee, that may be one of the reasons. It’s also my thoughts that usually keep me up. Why is it that in the middle of the night all the irrational fears and worries creep back? All the what ifs, all the maybes. Everything I have bee procrastinating, I remember now. The boxes I meant to order to organize our vitamins and supplements. My appointment with my cardiologist that I have been putting off. The get well card I bought a month ago for a YOU friend and never sent, she is better already.
Did my oldest study well for his chemistry exam tomorrow? Is the AC too cold for my 4 year old who always throws off the covers when he’s asleep? Was the school we chose for my daughter next year the right decision. Is my mother in law ok in Jordan with the cold weather? Am I giving the kids enough one on one time? My 11 year old wanted a hug, we started talking and I didn’t hug him. Will that scar him for life?
These are the crazy thoughts that keep me up at night.
Was that sound out on the neighbors roof a cat or a burglar? Maybe the chicken I had for dinner was bad... Why can’t I sleep?
I almost walked into the wall coming upstairs, I was so tired! How am I wide awake now?
I have no idea, but yet here I am. I have to be awake at 5:30 which is in 4 hours. I was planning on doing so much tomorrow. I have my to do list notebook om my night stand. I have a class with my personal trainer tomorrow at 3. I need to sleep so I can work out without having one of my annoying dizzy spells that are slowly coming back. Maybe it’s the heat. I’ve been lugging 1.5-liter bottles of water around the house in an attempt to stay hydrated. Maybe I did drink too much coffee. I only had three cups. Maybe the last one was too late in the day. I know I’m not alone awake. There must be other sleep deprived people up wishing they were asleep. Well I’m with you. Insomniacs of the world unite! Let’s find a solution.
I just remembered I have an herbal tea that’s supposed to help you sleep. I’m going to go make myself a cup. Let’s see if it helps.
I’m back with my “Chamomile, Linden, Lemon Verbena” tea. Let’s see if this helps. Maybe I should try reading my book while drinking this. The same book I haven’t picked up since the beginning of Ramadan. During Ramadan I prefer to only read Quran and prayer books. Ramadan ended 12 days ago. (Has it been that long?) I should have started reading again sooner.
The tea is too hot, I’ll let it cool while I finish writing down my rambling thoughts.
What was that sound? Is someone awake? Maybe it’s that burglar (cat) I heard on the roof. I’m getting up to check.
It was my oldest, he woke up to use the bathroom and can’t sleep either. I offered him flowery herbal tea, he declined. I told him to try counting sheep. Maybe I should have tried that too.
I’m going to post this and try reading my book and drinking my tea. I’ll let you know if it helped tomorrow. Hopefully I’ll actually sleep.
Good night.
Update: I managed to sleep a little after I posted this. I did have trouble sleeping last night too. Its defiantly my thoughts keeping me up. I’ll try the herbal tea tonight before I go to bed.
Cooking
Photo by Heather Ford on Unsplash
I don’t know if I have ever mentioned it; but I don’t really enjoy cooking. I was never much into cooking. I have always loved baking but not cooking. I guess when I was younger it was because I was grossed out by raw meat. The first three things I learned to cook involved ground lamb which I didn’t have to touch at all. One of them was actually a vegetarian dish.
My father opened the door to cooking for me when he bought me an Italian cook book. I was already obsessed with Italy. I studied about Italian architecture and their magnificent gardens and I was in love with anything and everything Italian. I confess that even then, I didn’t make much contact with raw meat. Haha. I did learn new recipes and one included fish! So that was a big step for me.
My mother is an amazing cook. Everything she makes is amazing. I think part of it is because she makes it with so much love. I have always helped her in the kitchen, chopping vegetables, stuffing grape leaves and cabbage leaves… I guess I preferred the artistic part, the precise part. I made the most beautiful kuba. I was specific shaping them all into the exact size and shape. Even my mother in law says I make the best ones.
When I got married, I mainly cooked Italian. We have always lived with my mother in law which is a huge blessing. She loves cooking and finds joy in feeding people. She is also the most amazing cook ever! We joke that even when she doesn’t make an effort or skips a step her food tastes delicious. So, I rarely need to cook. I do make dinner for my kids but it usually involves pasta and tomato sauce. Young children are easy to please. Not that my husband isn’t. He will eat anything I cook and doesn’t complain. Not even when I made him burnt chicken, under cooked brown rice and a salty salad for lunch. Haha. That was when we were newlywed and I honestly didn’t have much experience in cooking. I did wash the salad which actually helped. Haha.
Now, I cook all sorts of different cuisine. I know not everything I cook is authentic. I’ve learned how to cook most of the typical dishes eaten here. I try to make dishes as authentic as possible. My oldest loves cooking and is a great help in the kitchen. He also helps choose new dishes to try. He is my critique and is always reminding me how unauthentic my Italian dishes are! Haha, the irony!
The past year with the renovation my mother in law lived with her daughter for a couple of months which meant that I had to cook. I tried to embrace cooking. I tried new recipes, my husband and children are very encouraging. But honestly, I still would rather hire my own personal chef. Wouldn’t most of us though?!
My mother in law just left on Wednesday for a two month vacation in her summer home in Jordan. Which means I’m back to cooking again. I’m not very excited about it but I will still cook.
I will post as many recipes as I can throughout the week on Instagram and Pinterest. I’ll try some new recipes. Maybe this time I’ll find the joy in cooking that my mother and mother in law have.
Madinah
Photo by Amien Taryamin on Unsplash
I wrote this post on Tuesday, April 18th on the airplane from Madinah on my way home.
When I was going through my photos of the Prophet’s Mosque PBUH I realized I didn’t have many photos. I think that shows you how focused I was while I was there. How present I was. The city of Madinah gives you a feeling a calm and peace as soon as you arrive. The people of Madinah are a different type of kind you will only find there. They are so welcoming and hospitable.
That feeling of peace and calm increases at the Prophet’s Mosque. You will find people from all over the world, so different yet the same. We are all there for the same purpose. When I stood to pray there were people from different countries and backgrounds around me. We didn’t speak the same language yet we understood each other. I experienced so much kindness and generosity. We shared prayer mats and prayed together. We shared food at breakfast and ate together. Everyone sharing with the people surrounding them whatever they had to eat. I’m only talking about the people who have come from all over the world to pray. There is also a huge effort by the government and so many volunteers to help organize the massive amount of people. In minutes food is distributed and everyone has a breakfast package with the traditional Madinah futoor: dates, water, yoghurt, dukkah a mix of ground wheat and spices, and their famous bread “shraik”
There are also families from town that make their own Saudi coffee and bring their thermoses of coffee to share with all. The atmosphere of love and unity is truly one of kind. Though we do have the same atmosphere and love in Mecca it seems stronger in Madinah. It’s something I can’t explain but everyone I’ve spoken to has agreed with me.
When we arrived at Madinah, we rented a car and drove to our hotel which is within walking distance to the Mosque. My husband dropped me off close to the mosque so I could make it on time to Asir (afternoon) prayer, while he parked and check us in. The amount of emotions I felt waking towards the mosque was overwhelming. Feelings of gratitude and happiness that I was able to come during the Holy Month of Ramadan. I quickly arrived and sat waiting for prayer to start. The lady next to me started chatting with me, telling me about her trip to Mecca and now Madinah. We had a lovely chat before prayer started. We were sitting under the huge umbrellas that shaded us from the hot sun. We could feel the cool breeze of the fans that also spread a cool mist. It was as if they had managed to air condition the outside too. We spent the rest of the day between resting and praying. It was such an amazing experience. Something I really wanted after feeling a bit overwhelmed lately. Having a day and night of prayers by myself without any kids. Not being responsible for anyone except myself was exactly what I needed. I knew my kids were fine with my mother in law and sister in law. I am so lucky to have them. I didn’t need to worry about anyone. I got a day to myself, in my favorite city in the world. A day of peace and prayers. (my husband was with me but women and men pray in different divisions) This is exactly what I needed! I already feel recharged and ready to go back and finish Eid preparations.
Eid
Image by Sidhik Keerantakath from Pixabay
We have two main holidays in Islam: Eid Al Fitr, and Eid Al Adha. Eid Al Fitr is coming up in a week inshallah. It marks the end of the Holy Month of Ramadan, a month of fasting and worship. Eid is our gift from Allah (God) to celebrate and give thanks for the blessing of Ramadan. I have talked about Ramadan here and here.
Eid day starts early in the morning as the sun starts to rise. It is tradition in Islam to eat a date first thing in the morning. We dress in our best clothes and go to the mosque for Eid prayers. It is tradition to go to the mosque one way and come home another. Part of Eid Al Fitr is Zakaat Al Fitr, zakat is a type of charity. The idea is for those who can afford zakat, give to the poor so the poor can celebrate Eid too. It is given either the last couple of days of Ramadan or the morning of Eid before prayers.
We go to Eid prayers with my mother in law and meet my two brothers in law and their families at the mosque. I have a tradition of taking a photo of my kids together before we leave for prayers. I love seeing their sleepy faces and how much they grow each year. Last year my oldest was in London during Eid Al Adha, a reminder of how fast they grow! I know they won’t always be home for Eid morning photos.
Eid prayer is a short prayer followed by two short sermons. After the sermons the kids both give and receive candies, small gifts and money. It is always a pleasure to see all the little girls and boys dressed up on Eid morning. People from different backgrounds and authenticities gathered together to celebrate. We always have a basket of candies with us for my kids to give out. We started a tradition way back to give lollipops in cute lollipop holders. I used to print them and cut them out. Last year I found some store-bought ones. This year I completely forgot, maybe I’ll have time to make some this week.
After prayers, my two brothers in law and their families come home with us and join us for breakfast. Then they all go home and everyone rests. We gather again for lunch with the rest of my husband’s extended family.
I’ve mentioned how we throw a party for the kids after lunch. Every year, we choose a different theme. This year we are doing Under the Sea again. We’re running out of themes and my kids don’t remember the detail of the first party in 2014. I’ll make a separate post about the party details inshallah.
A tradition I started with my daughter during Eid 2020 was giving the adults little boxes of chocolates. The first year I printed and made my own boxes and labels. Then I found a shop that sold beautiful, reasonably priced boxes. I now own a label printer and print the names.
We also make goody bags for the kids in the family. I make sure everything is dairy & egg free because we have a child in the family with allergies.
Throughout the day family and friends will stop by to celebrate Eid with us. It is tradiotn in most Arabic countries to serve coffee and sweets. Here in Saudi Arabia we serve Saudi coffee, dates, chocolates and mamoul; a type of cookie stuffed with dates. Every family will have their own special traditions. My mother in law makes the most delicious mamoul. My mother makes delicate walnut cookies that are light and buttery and disolve in your mouth. I will try to share some recipes here on my blog. Honstly, I’ve still got bakers block and haven’t been very motivated to bake.
The first day of Eid is a full day for us but it’s a very special day of family and friends.
Eid is a three-day holiday. The second day we usually go to my husband’s sister’s houses in the evening for a short visit to celebrate Eid with them individually. Sometimes we get together later at one house. Sometimes we go home for a quiet night together. The third day is different every year. We might go out and do something fun as a family or with relatives.
With only a week left for Eid, I’m almost ready. We leave baking for last of course. We’ve made (colored) most of the decorations. I’m planning on starting decorating the house for Eid this week. Follow me on Instagram and Pinterest for some sneak peaks.
The Newborn Phase
This post was inspired my brother and his wife who have just welcomed a baby boy.
I think, when most people think of newborns, they think of sweet sleeping cuddly babies. Which is partly true, what’s not to love? Right? There is another part of newborns that most people forget; it’s such a difficult phase! Especially when it’s your first baby. No matter how much you’ve prepared, its still hard! You have this tiny human that depends on you completely. Whether you decide to breastfeed or not (fed is best, do what works for you) you are probably leaking milk among other bodily fluids coming out of you and being spewed upon you by said tiny human… Your priorities change. Sleep comes first at any time or place. Eating comes second because sleep is so scarce you need food for energy. Anything else comes last. It’s basically survival mode. It is normal to feel exhausted. Giving birth as beautiful as it is, is hard work! It doesn’t matter if you delivered naturally, via c section, opted for an epidural, or an all natural birth. Each has its challenges, and requires rest afterwards. So, in addition to recovering from birth you are also caring for a tiny human who’s biological clock is synced with the other side of the world. Don’t feel bad if your baby stays up all night. Its normal in the beginning. Even if you hear people saying their babies slept through the night at this age. Ignore them! Every baby is different! I’ve had five, each one was different, my fifth gave me the most trouble sleeping! It took us over a month to finally start sleeping at night. Sleeping, not sleeping through the night. I would doze off in a comfy arm chair with my feet propped up holding my baby all night because the second I put him down he would wake up. As soon as it was time for morning prayers I would wake up my husband so he could take the baby for a bit and I could lay down. My husband was so supportive the first month! He took time off of work so he could do school mornings, pickups, lunch and dinner. I would be there for dinner and bedtime but I slept all morning because that was the only time I could put the baby down to sleep! It was exhausting! One thing I learned to prioritize was, my daily shower. I wouldn’t skip a day and it made such a difference for me. Sometimes something simple as taking a shower and brushing your hair can make you feel human again! Well as human as possible when you barely sleep.
Being sleep deprived really messes with you. You start speaking nonsense and doing strange things. I have put a gallon of milk in the cupboard and only realized it because the box of cereal was too big to fit inside the fridge! I have asked my kids to things that made no sense like go where your teeth and brush your pajamas. I have called them the wrong name and I have given the wrong child the cup of fortified milk countless times. I also develop what can only be describe as a type of hysterical laughing when I’m exhausted and sleep deprived. My oldest, who is now taller than me, takes in a bear hug and tells me I need to go take a nap. How times have changed.
With your first baby, even touching the baby is scary. They are so small and fragile your afraid you’ll break them. You want to clean all the nooks and crannies, babies have so many wrinkles and folds that collect fuzz among other things. You want to be thorough but you want to be careful. Especially when the umbilical cord stump is still attached. You will be told that babies love a warm bath, they will sleep for hours afterwards! Not always true, some hate them! Some will become wide awake after said warm relaxing bath. You’ll learn what your baby’s preferences and develop your own routine.
Babies make weird noises, when they sleep, when they eat, when they poop… and in general. Sometimes it’s scary because you don’t know if its normal. The sounds while they sleep will probably wake you up. Is that normal? Is he ok? Should I wake him up? It’s usually all normal. You will be able to tell when it’s not and that is so rare.
It got easier for me with each child, it’s so easy to second guess yourself. Especially when you think you did everything right but the baby is still fussy. Sometimes all the baby needs is to sleep in your arms. Not ideal but sometimes that’s all they need. I spent so many hours being a human bed. With my oldest I had nothing to do and I loved it. With my youngest I had so much to but sometimes I had no choice! I did everything I could to help him sleep. I bought a swing for daytime naps, something I was against with my other children. I put the pack n play in the living room and would let him sleep on his tummy, with a firm mattress and no blanket. I know it’s still wrong and I would be constantly checking om him. Sometimes I was at my wits ends. I was so exhausted I needed him to sleep for my sanity’s sake. I bought different types of swaddles. This kind being my favorite. I would put a piece of clothing I had worn under him, tucked in firmly to be safe, in hopes that he would sense my scent and sleep longer. That worked sometimes. I bought a baby carrier, which was so much help! I had never used one before, but he was super clingy and sometimes the stroller was not an option!
You will find three types of people during this period; the helpful supportive people, who actually help, keep them close! The people who give unwanted advice and expect you to listen to them. You might say, they mean well and they probably do, but nobody knows what the baby needs more than the parents. There are so many different opinions on parenting, sometimes there is no wrong way. I remember with my first I had such strong opinions on what was right and wouldn’t listen to most people. I know now to pick my battles. Sometimes, you just have to smile and nod when people insist their way is best. Especially when it comes from well-meaning family members. The third type wants to visit you after you give birth to share their amazing super birth story, tell you how they baby slept through the night immediately and gave them no trouble with latching, was never gassy, or fussy. Keep them as far away as possible. Their kids are probably too old for them to actually remember any details of this sleep deprived, hormonal, exhausted time.
I know I’ve said this before but there is no one way to care for a baby. Every baby is unique in its needs. There is no “one method” to parenting. Trust yourself, you are doing your best. Remember this is a phase and like every phase, it has its difficulties and its joys. They will grow up faster than you can imagine and you will be left with the cute baby photos and one or two tiny outfits. Honestly, as I look back, I don’t think I have a favorite phase. Each phase is special in its own way. But since we are being honest, I don’t miss the new born phase. I’m glad I’m done with that phase of my life. I’m enjoying my kids at their different ages and the slight freedom that comes with it.
More about Ramadan
Photo by Tim Lippis on Unsplash
Last week I was having trouble finishing my post about Ramadan. I asked my YOUfriends; what they wanted to read about Ramadan. I got a lot of great feedback and was inspired to make a second post about Ramadan with more details about the Holy Month.
Ramadan is the 9th month of the Hijri (Lunar) calendar. Our months begin when we see the crescent moon. It marks the beginning of a month. That’s why we look for the moon before each month. Our months have either 29 or 30 days and every year is unique. Gregorian calendar follows the sun and that’s why it’s the same every year and the season are connected to them. It’s interesting because when I was a kid Ramadan was during the winter months. So, the days were shorter and cooler and it was easier to fast. This year is cooler than the past couple of years and we are grateful for that.
Also, we go buy the date of the prophet Mohammed PBUH’s pilgrimage to the city Madinah. So, this year is 1444 Hijri which means it’s been 1444 years since the Prophet Mohammad PBUH made his pilgrimage from Mecca to Madinah.
Fasting this month is the 4th pillar of Islam, which means it is a very important part of Islam. Ramadan is a spiritual month. A month of worship. It’s a month to get closer to God (Allah) We fast during the day while living our lives as usual. With small modifications, mainly because of the hot weather. In Saudi Arabia work days/ schooldays are a little shorter. Any professions that require work outdoors (e.g. construction workers) must work during the evening, after break-fast. At sunset, when we here the call of prayer. (Athan, we break our fast. Traditionally we eat a date first. In Saudi Araba & many Arab countries we drink liquid yoghurt (laban) with our dates. The slightly sour flavor goes perfectly with the sweetness of the date. You can break your fast on any type of food, it is a tradition of the Prophet PBUH to start with “Rutab” (ripe, soft dates) or tamr “ (ripe, sundried dates) or water.
Some traditional foods we eat during this month are; soups, salads, sambousa with different fillings. We also tend to eat sweets with coffee after taraweeh. Every family has slightly different traditions when it comes to what and when we eat. In general, we have two main meals. One is usually a light meal and the other is the main meal.
Ramadan evenings are a time for praying. In Islam praying “salah” is a physical action. There are specific movements and prayers (supplications) we say. Verbal prayers in Arabic is Du’a’. So, I f I say pray I mean the physical prayer. If I say Du’a’ it means verbal prayer.
During the month of Ramadan, we have a special prayer that we only pray during this month: Taraweeh. We pray it after our last prayer for the day: Isha. You can pray at the mosque, or at home by yourself. I have been praying at home since I became a mom because I know that young children don’t have the patience to stay quiet and still for so long, . When my kids grow older thy start going to the mosque with their father and grandmother. I honestly enjoy praying at home, even when I have little companions playing around me. The prayer ends with a Du’a’ where you are simply standing in the hands of God asking for whatever you want. We do focus on strengthening our connection with God, gaining his love and reaching the highest levels in Heaven. We also pray for worldly things like our health, families and prosperity. We pray for the world. Especially war-stricken countries. We prayed a lot for the world throughout the pandemic.
The Quran was first revealed to the prophet Mohammed PBUH in the month of Ramadan. We don’t know the exact date. We believe it is one of the last ten night of Ramadan. That night is named “Laylat al Qadr’ (the night of power or the night of decree) Allah informed us that praying on that night equals 1000 months of prayer which is a high honor Muslims hope to obtain by praying taraweeh and tahajud prayers.
The month isn’t only about fasting and praying, it is about checking on those less fortunate and supporting them however they need. It is about connecting with neighbors, who in Islam are very important. The prophet PBUH emphasized the importance of being a good neighbor. Ramadan is about connecting with family, which doesn’t necessarily mean big family gatherings and extravagant meals. It means asking about one another and checking on each other. Being there to support each other and share our journey of worship throughout this month.
I love that my oldest son walks his grandmother to the mosque, she prefers walking and likes to go early so she can walk at her own pace. It’s a short walk. I’m grateful my son has this chance to share these walks with her. I’m grateful that my kids get to see their uncles almost daily as they come over after praying together at the same mosque in our neighborhood to say hi and share a cup of Arabic coffee and a date or a dessert if we’ve made any. It’s about being together, precious time spent with family. Family drop by during the day sometimes just to check in on my mother in law. We are all fasting, they just drop by for a quick chat and leave. These connections are priceless.
To Muslims, the month of Ramadan seems to be the shortest month of the year. It flies by and before we know it, we are looking for the crescent moon to know if we will be fasting 30 days or only 29. After a month of Fasting and prayers, we prepare for Eid our first holiday of the year. A celebration of a blessed month of fasting and praying. God’s gift to us.
I hope this has opened a little window into what Ramadan is to us, to me. If you have any questions, feel free to ask.
Ramadan
Photo of the Prayer Garland I made.
This is my first Ramadan without my grandmother, May God have mercy on her soul. The week leading to Ramadan was hard for me. I kept thinking of her and how she was no longer with us. She had been the first person I called before Ramadan and Eid. Who would I call? How is she not here? I confess, lots of tears were shed throughout the week because everything reminded me of her. She loved Ramadan. It was her favorite month! She used to say: I wish it would never end.
When we came back from the US, experiencing Ramadan with family was so special. I remember how Iftar at each grandparent’s house (my mom’s mom & my dad’s dad) was different, each special in their own way. All the uncles, aunts, cousins getting together for Iftar was great. The table was set differently in each house, every family has their own traditions. Every family pitching in with a dish. Playing with my cousins, praying with the adults… Such special memories.
The older I got the more I understood the spiritual part of Raman. It is a month of worship. I month to focus and feel close to God. Fasting, reading Quran, praying. It brings me so much inner peace. I have more energy, more patience.
This month is all about peace and forgiveness. It reminds us to forgive and forget. To reconnect with family and friends. To help those in need. To connect with neighbors. We meet at the mosque for prayer, we send each other simple gifts, dates, a plate of food. It truly is the thought that counts. We help host meals at the mosque for those who don’t have family near by, anyone is welome. In Saudi Arabia you will find people standing at traffic lights giving away dates and water to those on their way home, late from work. It is a month of love when we are reminded that we are all human. We are all equal. I think, even if you aren’t Muslim, if you’ve ever experienced this month in a Muslim community, you must have felt the peace and love.
I confess Ramadan as a mother to young children isn’t easy. I don’t get much sleep. Functioning without much sleep and no coffee all day may seem impossible but during this month it isn’t. Meal preparation for me is easy. I plan ahead, have a lot of things prepared and ready in the freezer. Ramadan isn’t about eating so being prepared helps me focus on the important things. I somehow manage to care for my little ones. (I spent so many Ramdans with young children) I would keep them occupied planning for Eid, coloring decorations. I try to help them understand Ramadan by doing things together. When they were younger, we would make Ramadan decorations. I would sit with them in the afternoon and we would read Quran, and quotes of the prophet Mohammed (PBUH) A couple of years ago, I was looking for a new idea to do with the kids. I printed prayers on small pieces of paper and hung some small velvet black bags up like a garland. Each bag had a number pinned to it and a prayer inside it. Every day, one of my kids takes a prayer out of a bag and reads it out loud. It’s a small moment each day that brings us together. Even my youngest likes to feel include and he takes the paper and recites some versus of Quran that he’s memorized. I love that he wants to be a part of this even though he still hasn’t learned to read. We discuss the prayer and its meaning. It’s one of my favorite moments of the day.
I know that even though my days are busy with my kids now, especially my youngest. I may not have as much time as I’d like to focus on myself and my prayers, I know they will all grow and become more independent and I will have more time to myself. I try to to enjoy my days with them. Helping me prepare our main meal. Sitting together with their grandmother and father, enjoying our first meal of the day. Going to pray at the mosque with their father. Enjoying the yummy desserts their grandmother makes after taraweeh prayers. I look forward to more Ramdans together with them. I know they will grow up so fast and move out. I hope to make memories with my future grandchildren, the way I did with my grandparents and my kids do now.
Among Us Party
Two weeks ago, we finally had the Among Us Party. I had promised them this theme about 8 months ago. I was a little worried they wouldn’t find it fun since it’s been 8 months and they haven’t been playing Among Us as much lately. I had nothing to worry about. They had a blast. I didn’t invite many kids. My 5 kids and their three brothers by milk, plus one cousin. 9 kids were more than enough. As soon as my daughter finished finals she started helping me plan. I had already ordered little Among Us figures as Gifts at the end of the party. I ordered inexpensive colored t shirts for all the kids. I found some fun Among Us stickers that I used to make a garland, decorate the snack bowls and water bottles. Decorations and food were simple because I needed to focus on the tasks. Like I’ve mentioned before; games are the most important part of a party.
Free Printable from originalMOM
I found this great post by originalMOM about how to throw an Among Us Party with free printables. It was honestly so much help! I also found a website that explains the game and helped me come up with more tasks. This website also helped me locate the tasks so I could place them in the correct room. I have played Among Us with my kids in the past but I’m no pro. I had 7 kids playing , each one needed at least 4 tasks. My daughter preferred to plan with me and not play. My youngest is four so, we gave him a list of tasks but let him do whatever he wanted. He had a blast playing with the big kids!
I admit that there were a few things that I didn’t have time to do the way I wanted. I ended up writing the tasks by hand on note cards. I also wrote the name of the tasks on note cards. The kids didn’t mind. I don’t think they even noticed.
I had signs for each room. A note card for each task. I used a red paper as a background for the black signs for a pop of color and make the signs more visible. We had three floor and the front yard for them to play in. we made a WhatsApp group (some of the older kids had phones) that made it easier to call an emergency meeting if they found a body. We would give each kid a task card. We wrote the kids names on paper and would pick two random papers to choose the Imposters. After playing a couple of times they decided they wanted to add a Jester. The Jester acts suspicious so they vote him out. If he gets voted out he wins the game. If the Imposters kill everyone, they win. If the Crewmates complete all their tasks they win.
Playing it in real life requires some creativity. You can’t play it exactly the way they do in the video game. I had to make more tasks because I had a lot of kids playing. Honestly, if they wanted to play it again i would try to add more tasks. they had so much fun plating it but four tasks each ended up being super easy.
These are the tasks we had:
Most of them were from OriginalMOM. (It made planning this party so much easier!)
Submit Scan (Med Bay) We used a hula hoop. The stood in the middle of the hula hoop and lifted it up over them to scan themselves.
Garbage disposal: (Cafteria) I have a recycling bin in my kitchen fo plastic. I threw a bunch of bottles on the floor and they had to pick them up.
Clear astroids. (Weapons)
I printed two sets of asteroids and taped them to plastic cups. They used a toy gun that shoots foam balls to “clear the astroids”.
4. Clean the O2 Filter: (O2)
They needed to pick up all the fuzzy balls off the “O2 Filter” with chopsticks. I told them if you don’t know how to use chopsticks you can use the however you like. Its a game have fun!
5. Start the Reactor: (Reactor)
Play the matching game.
6. Enter ID Code: (Admin)
I used the decoders for this task. I made three different codes for them to deciipher. I had a small pad of sticky notes and had them give me th secret code so the others wouldn’t see it. I laminated the decoders and the “computers” so we could reuse them.
7. Fix Wiring: (Electrical)
They need to crisscross the wires. (rope) I didn’t have enough brads but it worked.
8. Fuel Engines: (Storage)
I had an empty water jug with a funnel in it and a water bottle filled with water. They had to pour the water (fuel) into the funnel to fill the jug. (engine tank)
9. Chart Course: (Navigation) Complete the maze. I laminate it and had them use an erasable board marker.
10. Unlock Manifolds: (Reactor)
Match the keys to the locks and unlock them. I had 4 locks.
11. Align Engine Output: (Engines)
I had three different tasks for this without realizing . i numbered them 1,2,43. Later my kids told me They are actually upper engine and lower engine.
I tied them together so they had to untie them first just to make it a little more challenging.
I cut a transparent folder and drew on it. They had to move the top layer to align it with the drawing under it.
12. Stabilise Steering: ((Navigation)
Cover the red tiles with the white tiles.
13. Calibrate the Distributer:
I cut out circles and wrote the fractions: 1/4, 1/2, 1, 1/4- 3/4, 1/4, 1/2, 1/4, 1/4 on the circles. They had two make the two sides of the scale even.
14. Assemble Artifact: (Security)
Put together a giant puzzle.
15. Divert Power:
I had three different tasks for this one. Two were outside where they hadto either turn on th front yard lights without turning on the street lights. They had to start over if they opened the wrong lift.
The third one was upstairs. They had tun on the spotlights only without turning on the rest of the lights.
16. Fix Weather Node: (Admin)
My daughter had the genius idea using magnets t mimic the task in the video game. We gave them a time limit (ten seconds to make it harder)
I taped the paper to the inside of the plastic container. The magnet was attached to another magnet inside the container.
There is another magnet inside the container, if the agent drops they have to start again.
Food:
For food we had colorful fruit, colorful candy and a pull-apart cupcake Among Us character made by my vey talented 13 year old daughter.
Party Favors:
I bought these super cute figures. You can take off the hats and switch them around. They had too much candy so I decided goody bags were unnecessary.
I hope you enjoyed this post. If you have any questions please leave me a comment. I’ll come back and add links soon.